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If you are Billy Ray Cyrus not only do you give your daughter your blessing on the relationship, but you also pat yourself on the back for setting her up.Fifteen-year-old tween sensation Miley Cyrus may be staying mum on the exact status of her relationship with 20-year-old “guy pal” Justin Gaston, but her self-proclaimed protective pop Billy Ray had no problem flapping his lips on TV’s “Access Hollywood” earlier this week.

In fact, in a move that would make most teenage girls cringe Billy Ray announced to the world that he actually considered his daughter’s relationship with her 20-year-old beau “a good thing.” You have to wonder if Billy Ray will be using those same words to describe the relationship when his daughter ends up like Jamie Lynn Spears.

How wonderful it felt to have an "adult" who valued our opinion; thought we were not just cute but interesting. I was wearing a Bundeswehr tank top I'd gotten at an Army supply store and faded jeans, a thrift shop crucifix around my neck. But as we sat there together in the sunshine, the wine buzzing my head, I suddenly felt … With real life, however, and memory especially, it is harder to keep things so neat and organized. In the first, I snuck out of the house with a guy friend who lived down the street. My friend came back, we went home and I slid back into my bed. The second incident I remember happened when he was giving me a ride home. As I got older, however, the more I realized that my experience was not an uncommon one.

My best friend was 14 when she fell in love with a 21 year old. My friend's older boyfriend was close with a guy I'll call T. My mother, spying him from the front window, asked me how old he was."I don't know," I said. After awhile, my friend and her boyfriend disappeared, leaving T. Many memories remain fuzzy, but incidents such as that day in the forest remain in crisp detail. It was late and my parents were asleep as we drove over to the house where T. At some point, my friend left to go somewhere, and for whatever reason I didn't go with him. Maybe he only stepped out to go to the store down the block. This was after the night at his house, though how much later I cannot say. It seemed just about every woman I knew had a similar story, a time when wanting attention meant getting the wrong kind entirely.

So hard that you will believe you are supposed to stay together forever. If the relationship was meant to be, it will work out even if you put other things first. Yes, the idea of someone sweeping you off your feet and rescuing you from the demons you battle sounds romantic. Don’t spend time with people that make you feel bad about yourself. Trust me, a year from now won’t regret leaving something that made you unhappy, you’ll wish you’d left it sooner. You do not need to have sex with someone to prove to them that you love them. If you feel pressure to have sex, remember that you have the right to say no.

Don’t create your identity on a foundation of someone else. They can be a great way to connect with another person and share similar interests, but make up your own mind and be your own person. Even if it means less time to spend with your boyfriend or girlfriend. First, stop thinking of a relationship as something that will save you. If someone loves you, they will wait until you are ready to have sex. It can bring two people closer together if the timing and situation is right and there is mutual trust and understanding, but sex can also fuck you up. I know it feels like they are against you and that they are trying to ruin your life, but they are actually trying to help. They’ve gone through a lot of the same things, and in the end they just want to keep you safe and protect you. You might think that your friends have everything figured out, but they don’t.




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